An employee isn't doing things the way you've told them to — repeatedly. Maybe they're skipping steps in a process, ignoring a policy, handling customers differently than you've asked, or simply doing tasks their own way after being corrected. You've said something before. It's still happening.
There are two very different reasons an employee doesn't follow instructions, and the conversation you need to have depends entirely on which one it is.
A training gap — they don't fully understand the instruction, the reason behind it, or how to execute it correctly. This is a coaching conversation. Your job is to re-explain clearly, check for understanding, and give them a real opportunity to get it right.
A willingness problem — they understand the instruction and are choosing not to follow it. This is a conduct conversation. Coaching won't fix it; accountability will.
The test: have they done it correctly before? Has the expectation been stated clearly and confirmed? If yes to both, you're dealing with willingness, not capability.
Managers often treat every non-compliance as a training gap because it's more comfortable — it lets everyone save face. But if you keep re-explaining something an employee already understands and is choosing to ignore, you're signaling that there are no real consequences. The behavior continues and gets harder to address over time.
The other failure mode is going too hard too fast on what's actually a training issue — making someone feel disciplined for a genuine misunderstanding, which damages trust and doesn't fix the problem.
"How many times do I have to tell you this?" — Expresses frustration but gives no information. The employee either feels attacked (training gap) or knows they've got away with it again (willingness problem). Neither outcome moves anything forward.
"[Name], I want to revisit [the process / the expectation] because I'm still seeing [specific behavior]. I want to make sure I've been clear — walk me through how you understand it's supposed to work. I want to find out if there's a gap in how I've explained it or if something else is getting in the way."
"[Name], we've talked about [specific expectation] before — on [date] and [date]. I'm still seeing [specific behavior], and at this point I need to be direct: this isn't a misunderstanding, it's a pattern. Following [the instruction] isn't optional. If it continues, we move into formal discipline. I need to know right now — is there something getting in the way, or are we clear on what needs to change?"
- Before the conversation, write down the specific instances — what the instruction was, when you gave it, and what the employee did instead. Vague recollections make for weak conversations.
- If you're not sure whether it's a training or willingness issue, start with the training gap script — it's lower stakes and you can escalate if the problem persists.
- If it's a willingness problem, name the consequences clearly. "This is something we'll need to document if it continues" is not a threat — it's honest, and it's necessary.
- Give the employee a chance to respond. Occasionally there's context you don't have — a conflicting instruction from someone else, a process that genuinely doesn't make sense. Listen before concluding.
- After the conversation, send a brief written follow-up that documents what was discussed and what the expectation is going forward. Keep it factual and short.
- If the behavior continues after a documented conversation, that's your basis for progressive discipline. You've established the pattern and the prior warning.
Whether you're dealing with a first-time misunderstanding or a repeat pattern that needs a firmer tone, the generator can write you a script that fits your specific situation. Free, no signup, ready in seconds.
Generate My Script